Early the next morning, a burst of violent knocking reached Yu Yan’s ears.
This was the presidential suite on the top floor of the hotel. Normally, no one should have come to disturb him at this hour.
Yu Yan frowned as he opened the door, his voice full of impatience.
“Who is it? It’s so early in the morning…”
Two police officers were standing outside.
“Mr. Yu, you know Gu Xichao, correct? Something happened to him.”
The fingers Yu Yan had resting against the doorframe tightened slightly, so subtly that it was almost impossible to notice.
However, there was no change in his expression. Only his voice became a little quieter.
“What happened to him?”
“Gu Xichao, the founder of Chaoyang Investment, died in a fire at his villa in the suburbs last night. Our initial assessment is that he died by self-immolation.”
“You were listed as his emergency contact. Please come with us and cooperate with the investigation.”
Yu Yan’s hand remained on the doorknob.
After hearing those words, his entire body clearly froze.
He stared at the two police officers as if he had not understood what they had just told him.
“…What?”
The officer repeated:
“There was a fire at the villa in the suburbs last night. Mr. Gu Xichao has been confirmed dead. Our initial assessment is that he took his own life by setting himself on fire.”
Yu Yan remained stunned for another two or three seconds.
His brows slowly drew together. His expression did not look sorrowful. It looked more like he had just heard something so ridiculous that he could not believe it.
He knew Gu Xichao too well.
That man was proud to his very bones. Wherever he went, he always carried himself as though he stood above everyone else. No matter how difficult things became, he would grit his teeth and force himself to endure.
How could he possibly have burned himself alive?
“…Suicide?”
Yu Yan repeated the word, his voice filled with doubt and disbelief.
All he had done was trick Gu Xichao out of some money.
Yu Yan fully believed that with Gu Xichao’s abilities, he could rebuild his career and rise again at any time.
Yet he had gone and killed himself?
How stupid.
The police officer nodded.
Yu Yan remained silent for a few seconds, as though he had finally taken in what he had heard. Then he turned and walked back into the presidential suite.
When he reached the corner of the hallway, Yu Yan casually took out his phone to check the time, then turned back and asked:
“How long will this take? I have a press conference at two this afternoon.”
The officer clearly had not expected Yu Yan to take the news so calmly. He froze for a moment before answering:
“If everything goes smoothly, about one or two hours.”
“All right.”
The interview was completed very quickly.
Yu Yan had spent the entire previous night at the celebration banquet. The security footage and witness statements were complete, proving that he had not been at the scene at all.
As soon as he left the police station, Cheng Yan called him.
Yu Yan got into the car and first sent a message to his assistant, asking him to confirm the schedule for the press conference. Only then did he answer the call.
“The police said Gu Xichao…”
“Mm, I already know.”
Yu Yan’s voice was extremely calm.
“All of Xilin Manor burned down.”
Cheng Yan was silent for a few seconds.
“Are you… all right?”
“What could possibly be wrong with me?”
Yu Yan lowered his head and looked through the schedule his assistant had just sent. His eyes moved over the work arranged for the next several days.
“My schedule for the next three days is completely full. I’ve already told my agent to have the media use this incident to bring me more attention.”
After the call ended, the car merged into the traffic.
Yu Yan leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes to rest for a while.
The sunlight outside the window was beautiful, and the city streets were as busy as ever.
No one knew that a person’s life had ended the night before.
No one could tell that the man sitting inside this car had just received news of that person’s death.
No one from the Gu family came.
Yu Yan simply handed Gu Xichao’s funeral arrangements over to someone else. He did not even attend to see him off.
For a long time afterward, Yu Yan was so busy that he barely had a moment to rest.
He had to sign the documents for the transfer of the Yu Group’s shares, attend management meetings for a new project, deal with the overlapping filming schedules of two movies, and appear in a livestream for a luxury brand’s year-end gala…
Yu Yan had no time to think about anything unnecessary.
That included what the police had told him that day.
It also included that name.
In the eyes of outsiders, it seemed that he had completely forgotten that person and everything they had once been through together.
But there was one thing Cheng Yan could never understand.
No one knew when it happened, but Yu Yan bought the land where Xilin Manor had once stood.
When the designer asked how he wanted the new house to be built, Yu Yan simply told him to recreate everything according to the original plans.
From the overall structure of the house to every small brick and every lamp, everything had to look exactly like the old Xilin Manor.
Before long, a completely new Xilin Manor had been built.
Yu Yan moved in almost immediately, without the slightest hesitation.
Cheng Yan teased him:
“Aren’t you afraid a ghost will come knocking on your door in the middle of the night?”
“What is there to be afraid of? If ghosts really existed, I would have faced my punishment a long time ago.”
Yu Yan gave a soft laugh, but there was little change in his eyes.
On his first night after moving into Xilin Manor, he slept in the master bedroom.
The bed was new, and the bedding was new as well, but both were exactly the same style as the ones they had used before.
Yu Yan closed the curtains tightly. The room was so quiet that he could clearly hear his own breathing.
He had thought he would be unable to sleep. Unexpectedly, the moment his head touched the pillow, he quickly drifted off.
He did not know how long he had been asleep when he suddenly felt himself wake up. However, his eyelids were unbearably heavy, and he could not open them no matter how hard he tried.
In his dazed state, he heard very light footsteps coming from the hallway.
Then the bedroom door was pushed open slightly.
Light from the living room slipped through the gap, and a figure stood in the doorway.
Gu Xichao was leaning against the doorframe.
He wore an old T-shirt, and his hair was still slightly damp, as though he had just finished showering. In his hand was a glass of milk.
He lowered his eyes to look at Yu Yan. His voice sounded exactly as it had before, carrying a hint of blame but even more affection.
“Staying up late again? I poured you some milk. Drink it, then go to bed early.”
Yu Yan wanted to answer him, but no sound would come from his throat.
He wanted to reach out and take the glass, but it felt as though something heavy was pressing down on all four of his limbs, leaving him completely unable to move.
Yu Yan struggled desperately to sit up. He gathered every bit of strength in his body and suddenly opened his eyes.
A white ceiling.
A pitch-black room.
Only a thin line of light from the streetlamp slipped through the gap in the curtains.
There was no one there.
The bedroom door was still tightly closed. There was no glass of milk and no sound of footsteps.
“Damn it!”
Yu Yan was so irritated that he nearly lost control. He grabbed the empty pillow beside him and threw it hard toward the window.
But the pillow was too light. It simply fell softly to the floor, nowhere near enough to release the anger inside him.
Yu Yan took a deep breath, got up, and pulled open the floor-to-ceiling curtains.
The artificial rock garden and koi pond outside looked exactly as they had before, yet he felt that everything had changed.
No…
What right did Gu Xichao have?
Who was he trying to impress by killing himself?
To Yu Yan, Gu Xichao had only been a stepping stone on his road to success.
He was already dead, so why did he still have to come back and bother him?
When he was alive, Gu Xichao had kept Yu Yan like a canary and spoiled him like a pet.
When he was happy, he gave Yu Yan money. When he was unhappy, he still gave Yu Yan money.
He spent his money and energy and poured all his resources into clearing a path for Yu Yan.
Hadn’t he done all that simply because he desired Yu Yan’s beauty and wanted to satisfy his own needs?
Hadn’t Yu Yan played his part well too?
He had devoted himself to pleasing Gu Xichao for two whole years. Before betraying him, hadn’t Yu Yan always cared for him attentively and looked after every little detail?
The happiness and excitement Gu Xichao wanted, the feeling of being loved and the satisfaction he needed, which of those things had Yu Yan failed to give him?
Gu Xichao gave him what he wanted, and Yu Yan gave Gu Xichao what he needed.
What existed between them had only been a mutually beneficial transaction.
Besides, there were still grudges between them from what had happened many years ago…
Hadn’t Yu Yan already been tolerant enough toward him?
Did Gu Xichao expect Yu Yan to truly love him?
Gu Xichao, you were nothing more than someone’s illegitimate son. With a background like yours, did you really think you deserved to be loved?
Who did you think you were?
All you had was some money and a few useful connections. Once I was finished using you, you had no value left.
And without saying a single word, you went and killed yourself.
Childish!
Stupid!
Once a person died, they had nothing left. Money, power, luxury cars, beautiful people… everything disappeared.
How could he bear to give up so much?
Who was he trying to impress by acting so noble?
When he was alive, he got to sleep beside Yu Yan every night. He must have enjoyed himself, hadn’t he, Gu Xichao?
If he had enjoyed it so much, why had he shown no attachment at all before choosing death?
But did he really think Yu Yan had wanted to sleep with him?
The truth was that Yu Yan had never been interested in him at all.
He was already dead, yet he still came back to bother Yu Yan. Who was he trying to disgust?
What gave him the right to die whenever he wanted?
Did he think Yu Yan would be heartbroken over him? That Yu Yan would cry until his face was covered in tears?
No.
Since the day you died, I, Yu Yan, have never shed a single tear.
Not then.
Not now.
And certainly not ever.
That night, Yu Yan stood by the window for a very long time.
In the end, he still picked up the pillow from the floor, carried it back to bed, and continued sleeping.
The night beyond the window stretched endlessly, without even a sliver of moonlight.
Perhaps even Yu Yan himself had not realized that he was living in a hell without Gu Xichao.
After that, Yu Yan began dreaming of him often.
Sometimes, in his dreams, Yu Yan would be lying in bed with Gu Xichao asleep beside him.
He would turn to look at the man and reach out to touch his shoulder.
But the moment his fingertips made contact, the person before him would burst like a bubble and vanish with a soft pop.
Not even a dent remained on the bedsheet.
Sometimes, Gu Xichao would be sitting on the sofa watching television.
Yu Yan would approach him from behind, intending to rest an arm across his shoulders. Yet before his hand could reach him, the man in front of him would disappear.
Other times, Gu Xichao would be standing with his back to Yu Yan, cooking at the kitchen counter.
Yu Yan would call out to him.
The instant Gu Xichao turned around, his face would dissolve into a cloud of white mist.
Every dream ended the same way.
Yu Yan reached out.
Gu Xichao vanished.
Then Yu Yan jolted awake.
Cheng Yan witnessed it once and was startled.
“What’s wrong with you? Why don’t you move out of that house? That land was already unlucky to begin with.”
Yu Yan lay on the sofa with his eyes closed. It took a long time before he finally replied:
“No need.”
“Then do you want to see a doctor? Or maybe take some sleeping pills?”
“It won’t help.”
In truth, it was not as though Yu Yan had never seen a doctor.
His drawer was already filled with blister packs of sleeping pills. But just as he had said, none of them worked.
Medication did not help.
Food did not help.
Yu Yan could not tell anyone that in his dreams, he was forced to experience the same loss over and over again.
Every time he reached out, Gu Xichao shattered before his eyes.
Every time he woke up, reality reminded him once again that the man was gone.
The cycle repeated endlessly.
Even so, Yu Yan refused to move away.
He would rather believe he had gone insane than admit that he missed Gu Xichao.
“Gu Xichao was nothing more than someone else’s illegitimate son. He was spoiled from birth and always got whatever he wanted. He could never understand how hard you worked for everything you have. If you ask me, you really don’t need to feel so guilty…”
“Who feels guilty?! I only wish he’d stay as far away from me as possible!”
“Then you…”
“Don’t ever mention that name in front of me again.”
From that day onward, Cheng Yan never mentioned Gu Xichao’s name in front of Yu Yan again.
It became a forbidden subject between them.
One year later, the private investigator brought back some news.
They had found someone who had seen Gu Xichao shortly before his death.
At the top of the Western Hills, the wind howled fiercely.
Zhou Gui’s head was covered, and his entire body was pinned firmly to the ground. He trembled violently in fear, begging without pause:
“Please spare me… Please, spare my life! I’ll give you as much money as you want! Please let me live! Gu Xichao’s death truly had nothing to do with me! Boss…”
Yu Yan stood three steps away, looking coldly down at him as though he were nothing more than a pile of garbage.
He moved a finger slightly.
The bodyguard beside him immediately pulled the hood from Zhou Gui’s head.
Zhou Gui’s face was revealed. His nose was badly swollen, his face covered in bruises, and fresh blood coated half of it. He was almost unrecognizable.
Yu Yan looked away, his brows drawing together as though he had just seen something filthy and utterly repulsive.
Through eyes swollen into narrow slits, Zhou Gui stared at Yu Yan for several seconds before suddenly recognizing him.
Everyone in the country knew that face.
His tone changed at once.
“Why is it… you? Didn’t you hate him to death? Why did you bring me here?”
Yu Yan ignored him completely.
He lowered his gaze to the dagger in his hand. A cold gleam flashed across its blade.
Then Yu Yan bent down and drove the dagger straight into Zhou Gui’s thigh with all his strength.
Blood sprayed out, splattering several drops across Yu Yan’s pale, refined face.
Zhou Gui screamed in agony:
“Ah!”
Yu Yan still did not look at him.
He withdrew his hand, turned around, and accepted the handkerchief offered by a bodyguard. Then he slowly wiped his hand clean.
Only then did he speak calmly:
“I heard you once shot him in the leg.”
“I wanted to shoot you too, but then I thought that would be letting you off far too easily.”
“A knife is better. One stab at a time. Only then will it be satisfying enough.”
Zhou Gui curled up on the ground in pain. Even his voice trembled:
“What… what part of this is satisfying?”
Yu Yan tossed the handkerchief back into the bodyguard’s arms. The corner of his lips lifted slightly, but there was not a trace of warmth in his smile.
“I said it satisfies me.”
With that, Yu Yan turned and slowly walked toward the car.
The wind whipped the hem of his long coat behind him.
One of the bodyguards called out from behind:
“What should we do with him?”
Yu Yan did not break his stride. He merely replied coldly:
“Just make sure he stays alive.”
Zhou Gui’s hoarse screams came from behind him.
“Don’t forget that you also played a part in Gu Xichao’s death! If you hadn’t ruined him and driven him into bankruptcy, would he have killed himself… Ah!”
Yu Yan sat in the driver’s seat and lit a cigarette.
For some reason, hearing someone curse him as the man who had driven Gu Xichao to his death made him feel strangely calm.
Two years ago, their relationship had been nothing more than a secret affair that could never be made public.
With a single flame, Gu Xichao had taken every trace of their relationship down to hell with him. From that moment on, there was no longer any evidence in this world that the two of them had ever been together.
Yet today, amid another man’s hateful accusations, Yu Yan seemed to have finally recovered the connection between himself and Gu Xichao.
That evening, after returning home, Yu Yan washed every trace of blood from his body before lying down.
For once, he slept straight through until morning.
He did not dream of Gu Xichao.
Yu Yan thought to himself:
Good.
That bastard Gu Xichao had finally stopped coming into his dreams to bother him.
No…
Why had he stopped coming?
What gave him the right to show up whenever he wanted and leave whenever he pleased?
Did he think this place was a hotel?
Huh?
Damn you, Gu Xichao! Even in death, you refuse to stay put. You keep finding new ways to torment me…
Yu Yan felt that he truly despised Gu Xichao.
That man was pretentious, arrogant, and always acted as though he were above everyone else.
Even in a dream, there was not a single thing about him anyone could possibly like…
Forget this lifetime.
Even in his previous life, his next life, or the life after that, Yu Yan would never, ever fall for someone like Gu Xichao!
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